Your Letters (AU!Armin x reader)

// Colonial Circus AU! //

The young blond boy sat there once again, sobbing quietly against the worn bark of the tree that overlooked the rustic town. He never noticed the small girl watching. She always wondered why he was like that, or who gave him those bruises and cuts.

“But I’ve got to do my papa and mama’s job,” she decided, tugging the ends of her hand-me-down vest down and tying on her self-made Pierrot mask, all while sitting on a low lying branch.

As expected he came, still oblivious to her presence.

“Why are you crying?” the girl exaggeratedly tilted her head to the side as she spoke behind the strung-up mask. He jolted up, snapping his neck towards the sound then staring at her questionably, wiping his sleeves against his damp cheeks.

“N-nothing,” he answered, turning his body around to face the girl.

“Well don’t you fret anymore for I am here now!”

This was her first time performing in front of someone besides her group mentors, so she took a deep breath to aid with the slight nervousness.

“What are you doi-“

“Watch!” She turned herself around so that her back was facing him, soon shifting her weight back which allowed her to slip off the branch.

“Hey!” he yelled, getting up and reaching his hands out ready to catch her, but her legs latched onto the branch like two hooks.

“G-get down from there, it’s dangerous!” he worryingly called, unsure if he should hold onto her or not, but she merely giggled, swinging her body back and forth.  The ridiculous sight soon brought a small smile to his face.

“You smiled! Finally!” she exclaimed, pointing to the poorly painted on grin on her mask with both hands before gladly dropping down.

“Why are you wearing that?” he asked, pointing to the disfigured face that covered hers.

“My costume.”

“Take it off, it’s creepy.” He stepped forward, taking the small strings in his hands and untying them while being careful not to pull her hair off. A light blush soon tainted his cheeks.

“Why are you always crying?” she asked again, patting down her pants.

“Nothing,” he repeated.

“It’s something.”

“Not really.”

“Just tell me!” she whined, growing tired of his lying.

“I-I,” he stuttered, “I’m weak, compared to my friends, I’m just so weak. I can’t even defend myself without them.” His eyes began to water while the girl grew frantic, thinking of how her mom would handle the situation but nothing came to mind.

“I’m always the one who has to be saved, and I-“, she hugged him as tightly as she could, hoping to somehow squeeze the sadness out.

“You aren’t them but you are you! Don’t compare yourself to them because you’re strong in your own way!” She loosened her grip.

The boy lingered awkwardly for a while before founding himself bringing his hands around her. She pulled away and took the mask away from him with a wide grin on her face.

“I’ll bring my balancing ball tomorrow so you better come!”

“O-okay,” he spoke, surprised at her change of volume.

“I’m (y/n) by the way.” She held her hand out, he slowly brought his hand up to meet hers.

“Armin.”

~~~

Day by day they met up by that tree. She’d show him the new tricks she was taught and he’d show her his books in return. Soon enough the two grew as close as can be.

“I can’t stand them hurting you! Let’s go! I’m going to kill em’!” Armin grabbed her arm and pulled her back.

“What’s the use of paying violence with violence? I’d rather spend my time here, so calm down (y/n) and let’s just enjoy the day.” He laid down on the grass and took a deep breath, closing his eyes and thinking about the wide oceans of the Mediterranean.

The girl solemnly stood with tears brimming from the edges of her eyes and her fists clenched in a mixture of anger and sadness.

“We’re leaving again.” She softly spoke.

“What?” he sat up, mentally denying what he heard.

“We’re a travelling circus troop, and my mommy says that the contract here is done. We have to move on to the next.” Her voice grew higher with each word spoken.

“No.” Armin got up and stood in front of her, “You’re gonna come back right?”

Her nod brought only a slight relief to his sadness.

“But I don’t know when, and I don’t wanna leave!” She abruptly hugged him as tight as she could, crying into his shoulder.

“I’ll write to you,” water brimmed around his eyes while he stroked her hair.

“I still don’t want to leave you.” Her voice cracked as he weakly sobbed.

 “Just come back to me okay?” she nodded, holding onto him as tight as she could.

~~

“They’re here!” a little boy shouted, pulling his friend into the town square where music rang throughout the place. Cheers and conversations filled the air as a marionette-like girl spun to the melody, mixing the performance with stunts and contortions that earned herself claps and cries of awe.

“Look mommy!” The small girl in her mom’s arm’s pointed towards the dancing figure who saw and came up to the two, slowly sweeping her hands to the back of the girl’s ear and pulling out a small flower. The girl gasped, clapping happily as the performer gave her mother the flower before continuing on with her show.

The marionette-girl’s heart fluttered, it’s been twelve years and she was glad to be back here.

She huffed tired breaths as she bowed, walking to the horse-drawn carriage that was decorated in an array of colors.

“Great job (y/n)! I’m sure this will bring our new site a lot of attention,” The man with heavy white clown makeup praised, tugging on the reins which signaled the horses to move.

“Thanks! I think I’m gonna visit this one place, after I change of course.”

The cart began to move as she took off her mask and wiped the sweat off her face, enjoying the slight breeze that swept by.

“I wonder where he is,” she whispered to herself, looking at the unfamiliar faces that passed by.

“You mean that guy you keep writing to?” The juggler in the back teased, nudging her in the shoulder with his finger.

“Y-yeah, I haven’t heard from him in months actually,” she claimed as she rubbed the sore spot caused by him. Jugglers don’t understand their own strength, especially one that uses metal based juggling pins.

The cart pulled into the busy grounds. The air was filled with the clatter of hammers and shouts of commands that came from overly muscular men. (Y/n) got off and ran to the small dresser tent, changing into her casual dress.

“Where are you going?” her mother stepped in, she and her father were the world renowned trapeze artist duo, one of the highlights of each of the shows.

“Out, I’ll be back soon.” She lifted her skirt up to her ankles and lightly jogged out, the hill was at walking distance but her shoes made it unbearably long. She took them off half way breathing a sigh of relief as she finally reached the hill.

She looked around, savoring the feeling of the cool grass in between her toes as she stepped towards the tree. The bark looked as old as ever with tattooed on carvings and peeled off chunks of the surface.

Nobody was there. She dropped down onto the grass and leaned against the tree, alleviating her cramped up legs by pulling her skirt up to her knees and wiggling her dying toes.

Pictures of the past played out like a book. Was Armin still here? Did he even read that letter that told him of her arrival?

After a while she grew discouraged, asking herself if she was the only one who actually cared.

The light breeze ruffled the leaves and managed to sweep some dirt into her eyes. She rubbed them in attempt to alleviate the discomfort.

“Why are you crying?” a deep voice spoke from above, she tilted her head up to see the blond figure. He was sitting on the same thick branch she used to.

“I’m not though,” she smiled.

“Well then don’t you fret. I am going to do something reckless whether you were crying or not.” He slipped off the branch and hooked his legs the same way she did all those years ago, but one of his legs slipped off, causing him to hit the ground with a loud thud.

“Are you alright?” She spoke as she immediately crawled over to him, watching as he rolled over in pain, the wind was obviously knocked out of him.

“Not really,” he heaved, now facing her, “you look different.”

“It’s the dress and lack of mask that makes the difference.” She lightly punched  his shoulder while he chuckled.

“I missed you,” he sheepishly spoke.

She blushed at his words while he continued.

“I did write a reply to your letter but I guess something went wrong with the postage.” He stared at her eyes, attempting to read her emotions.

“I-I missed you too Armin.” She found it hard to return his stare.

“Do you know what the reply was,” he asked as he sat up, “It was to what you told me a while before.”

 “Dearest Armin,

    The trees here remind me of the one on that hill where we first talked. Do you still visit the place from time to time? I hope when you do you think of me and smile. The picture you sent me was really lovely thank you so much. I’ve attached one of my own onto the letter as well. You can’t see the colors but the lake here is as blue as the sky! I probably look weird laying on the ground like that but the previous show left me tired and my troop mate just loves taking unflattering pictures of me. Maybe one day I’ll take you here, and maybe it will be just the two of us. Contracts are coming around from all sorts of places. Hopefully one from there will come up soon.
Take care of yourself, sometimes you make me worry too greatly for my own good.

        With Love,

       (Y/n) (L/n) ”

“Don’t let my words get in the way of your engagement. Just being able to see you again is enough.” She smiled despite the pressure that constricted her chest.

“I told them my refusal.” He patted down one of the crooks on her skirt, “and although met with great disdain, my grandfather finally accepted it.”

“Why?” her voice trembled with a bubbling mix of guilt and doubt.

“Because of you.” His words left her speechless.

    “Dear (Y/n),

    Over the course of events, I have learned a few things about life. One, grandfathers will try to marry their grandsons off for social class purposes. It might seem shallow, but it’ll all make sense when you find out his heart condition from the family doctor. And two, you can't force yourself to have feelings for someone else when there is a person already occupying your mind all hours of the day. Calling off the arrangement took a while, it took me months to convince him to stop. I told him of a lot of reasons, most, if not all of them lead back to you. Words can’t express the excitement I feel knowing you’ll be here soon. Take care, you are always in my thoughts, tree or not.

            Sincerely yours,

            Armin Arlert "

“I don’t know what to say,” she spoke incredulously.

“Then say you’ll stay by me.” Armin reached out and took her hand.

“But the troop, I can’t leave them.” She stared down at their hands, stroking her thumb against the back of his hand.

“I would never make you leave. I want to go to places with you, just like the one in the letter.” She got up to her knees, bringing his hand up along with her own.

“I can’t just tear you away from your life here.” He paused, turning his head in view of the town scenery.

“I always dreamed to leave and travel across exotic lands, to be only limited to this place should be a crime.”

“But what about your grandfather or your friends?”

“They already know how important this is to me, and besides,” he followed her actions, sitting up on his knees and nearing himself to her. He brushed the messy strands of hair away from her face.

“I’d leave either way.”

“Don’t say that.”

“It’s the truth,” he gestured a cross pattern over his heart with his free hand. She stayed silent, being once again at a loss for words.

“It might seem kind of preposterous and unbelievable, but I...I love you (y/n).” She smiled widely with that same smile he recognized from their very first encounter.

The girl paused for a second, “you sure?” Armin laughed, following it with a clear nod.

“I love you too. Maybe even more.” She let out a small laugh as she said this.

The boy shifted uncomfortably, looking at anything but her face.

“May I,” he began.

“May I what?” she asked.

“May I attain the consent to... to,” he grumbled in a flustered state, “You know.”

“Know what?” she teased, giggling at his distressed face. Armin took a ridiculously deep breath, soon abruptly leaning forward till their foreheads slightly bumped.

“May I continue on?”

The flush in his cheeks grew contagious as they made their way across her own. She replied with a small nod, closing her eyes while trying to best ignore her racing heart which all at once disappeared. She could taste the bitterness of tea on his slightly chapped lips.

His kiss was short and sweet. A part of him feared that after all these years, everything happening now was just a dream and that she would disappear the moment he opened his eyes, but she was still there, this was real.

“I’ve always wanted to do that.” He grinned from ear to ear, watching her as she did the same.

“What’s stopping you from doing it again?”